The testing of the journeyman.
As recent days go Sunday morning wasnt much unlike the days before it. Sunny and shaping up to be a scorcher. I woke up about 830am, got my crap together and headed out to link up with Kem and Stae2 (dont get excited they are only mentioned in the story, this is a low budget sotry and we couldnt afford to more then jsut mention them); sort of. Since becoming a father, Ive had me cool downgraded a bit so I wasn’t going to embarrass them by paint with them, just near by, but i digress. Im on the road by 915am, stopping at a bodega to grab some travel drinks, i realized i wasn’t wearing my painting shoes. Caution to the wind, and not wanting to be any later then i was already i decided to not go home and switch it up. 930am driving along listening to traffic, when BOOM loud ass noise, obstructing the pleasant traffic sounds. At first i decided it was the muffler, HOPED it was the muffler, you can drive with a fucked up muffler. You just end up announcing your self several miles prior to arrival. Quickly my hopes we dashed as the car became somewhat splash and was not handling well at all. Yeah!!!!!! 931am, Limped to the shoulder of the highway. I get out and walk around the car to find the driver side rear tire destroyed. Equal parts, anger, frustration and embarrassment prevented photos from being taken, plus we all know what a baller ass 5 series BMW looks like, and for the proposes of this story thats what i rock, on the weekends.
935am, what to do do. Its hot, dam, if its this hot now its gonna be like death later. I have triple A. I am also at times a stubborn ass motherfucker, who is god dam MAN. I can change a tire, and make a fire, Im a survivor; it is however really hot out and i have triple A. 945am, im MAN, i can change and tire and make a fire god Dam it, lets GO! Everything from the trunk of the car is now on the side of the road so i can get the spare tire and the jack out from its nest conveniently placed under the area youre encouraged to store shit; good planning. 950, Jacks in place ready to life, but wait whats that batman, your lug nut wrench isnt the right size? How can this be? WTF, seriously. What dumb-ass at the plant ran out of size 5 wrench kits and just tossed in a size 4, like its ‘close enough’. Okay, that sucks i coulda been back on the road and ready to rock if the wrench was the right size. 955am, FUCK! SO triple A it is. I get on the horn with with triple A, go through the 20 minute rigga-ma-roll, until the magic happnes. All the info to finally get told the inevitable. 1005am, “Sir Im sorry, triple A is not authorized to operate on New York Parkways. You will have to get road side assistance from an Authority authorized company.” YAY! WTF? so whats the bottom line here? Im told they can make the call for me, cool. And i have options, Love options-except when there are too many and it makes impossible the choosing of said options. Option one, have the authorized co come and change tire and what have you and pay them, which can be reimbursed by triple a after submitting receipts, filling out countless forms and a DNA sample. Option two, if next exit is under 4 miles have them tow you for free to the exit, once off parkway property re-call triple A and start the process over again. Option three none above, just sit there like a dummy - somewhat as i was already doing. So being a fan of multi-tasking I chose both option one and option 3.
1040am, Pete showed up in his flat bed. Pete was a nice enough dude, although on eof those people that loved a captive audience and stopped more then a few times in the middle of changing the tire to tell me some roadside assistance stories. 11am, Im back on the road, but not in the direction of the wall, shits too far away to limp on a donut (youd think a 5 series would have a full sized spare). Resigned to call it a day i headed home.
1120am, Enue calls. ‘yo lets go do this wall in jers’. Word? you have no idea, what i jsut went through, and Im at the exit to you crib now, im rolling with you, BOOM A-Team flexible (NH) plan coming together (double NH) .1245pm, COD time in Effect, walls buffed and i been a sweaty mess since the flat tire incident and now am slowly melting into the pavement. Car radio rocking, small water bottle sipping, no shade, living large.
810pm, Getting ready to bounce bounce, Enue starts the car , tries to start the car. Nothing, except the lush sounds of battery clicking with out enough power to turn the engine over. For Fucks sake! Really? 825pm Back on the horn with my good friends at triple A. 20 minute info/account check; ’sir now what is your location?’. Im in XXX new Jersey. ‘Oh you called ny triple A, please let me transfer you’, GREAT! holding. 840, still holding. Pacing. climbing on shit. bored. 850pm connected to nj triple A, but not to the right club zone in NJ, awesome! Finally get through and set it up and help is on the way. However while i was on hold Enue went out onto the street to a near by cab stand to see if he could wrangle a jump. Haha, what dumb-ass in this part of town is gonna agree to follow you in to a secluded and dark parking lot to help you jump a car? 930pm Well Apparently Jose was jsut such a dumb-ass and enue shows up in a cab. Hot dam we back in business baby! 940pm cars on and running, Enue finished his piece a lil bit. 1230am, back at Enues crib to get the whip and limp home. what a fucking day.
